How often do you feel the need to ask for permission to exist? Or to apologize for doing basic human things? I was (and still am at times) someone who feels like I am the biggest bother and burden to exist. The words, "I'm so sorry" and "Is this okay" used to come out of my mouth so often someone told me that these were my catchphrases. I lay in bed one night thinking about how I had gotten there. Why did I feel like I needed to apologize or ask for permission to breathe?

I had been conditioned my whole life to see myself as not good enough or worthy enough to even require my basic needs met. I should be grateful and thankful for the scraps I had been given because even that was "too much". After the revelation that I felt like I needed to have the "A-OK" for existing, I decided I was done apologizing and asking for permission to have what was all ready mine - value, love, worthiness. I require no one's permission to have love. I was done giving my power and autonomy to everyone else. And it was time to take back what was and is rightfully mine.

There are so many cages we allow ourselves to be put into. But you never flourish, you never fly, if you stay in the cage. And you were meant to soar. I have a tattoo on my shoulder of a birdcage that is small and a large peacock next to it. The door to this birdcage is open and the key is in the peacock's mouth. This symbolizes many things for me but the biggest was I am not meant for a cage and even if I allowed myself to be placed in it, I can let myself out. All of us have the key to unlock these cages. You do not need to ask for permission to have worthiness, power, or even love. It is all ready yours.

Is it scary to stop asking and start just doing? Yes. Will others have a hard time when you start to reclaim what is all ready yours? Yes. But can you do it? Absolutely YES! Boudoir is one way to have that space and I love being able to help other women create that space for themselves. To be able to see they can take back what is all ready theirs. So if this is an experience you think you need or want be sure to get in touch! Until next time please enjoy the beautiful and absolutely ravishing Miss J.